The Great Wall of Chocolate

P.F. Chang’s has the greatest contrasting items on any menu I’ve ever seen. On one hand are the über-healthy Lettuce Wraps and on the other hand is the insidiously evil Great Wall of Chocolate. I just checked the nutritional information on the Great Wall. It’s insane:

It weighs 560 grams (a pound and one quarter)
1,440 calories (the recommended diet for a male is 2,000 calories for an entire day)
204g of carbs (about a half of one pound)
68g of fat (equal to about 5 teaspoons of Crisco)
1,400 milligrams of sodium (equal to about 5/8 of a teaspoon of salt)

I read an article about this monster from 2009 and the measurements were about 20% higher across the board. I suspect that Chang’s has not chosen to use healthier ingredients. Instead, I’m guessing it just cut the portion from 672 grams (24 ounces) to a much more svelte 560 grams (20 ounces).

I was pondering upon what occasions I would indulge myself with such a thing. The first is if I found out that I had inoperable stage four cancer and the second is if I committed a crime worthy of the death penalty and I was offered a last meal. Other than those, I’ve yet to love myself or loathe myself so much as to make such a big, gooey, tasty, chocolatety mistake (crap, I’m drooling).

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